The Incorporated States of NSC Puppet 79 is a colossal, efficient nation, notable for its museums and concert halls, frequent executions, and spontaneously combusting cars. The hard-nosed, hard-working, cynical, humorless, devout population of 6.216 billion NSC Puppet 79ians are kept under strict control by the oppressive government, which measures its success by the nation's GDP and refers to individual citizens as "human resources."

The large, corrupt government juggles the competing demands of Administration, Law & Order, and Industry. Citizens pay a flat income tax of 83.4%.

The frighteningly efficient NSC Puppet 79ian economy, worth 963 trillion cards a year, is fairly diversified and led by the Retail industry, with significant contributions from Automobile Manufacturing, Woodchip Exports, and Book Publishing. Black market activity is rampant. State-owned companies are reasonably common. Average income is an impressive 155,048 cards, with the richest citizens earning 9.0 times as much as the poorest.

Ample hospital parking is half-filled by the luxury cars of hospital managers, farting etiquette is taught in schools, the government is frequently held to ransom by the increasing demands of bloodthirsty pirates, and politicians are often seen drinking soft drinks at the end of every public address. Crime, especially youth-related, is totally unknown, thanks to the all-pervasive police force and progressive social policies in education and welfare. NSC Puppet 79's national animal is the legendary, which is also the nation's favorite main course.

NSC Puppet 79 is ranked 280,551^st in the world and 2,571^st in Two for Most Cheerful Citizens, with 27.72 Percentage Of Water Glasses Perceived Half-Full.